Alright, what?
Firstly, I saw " he was more than ten years older than me" and wondered how old they actually were, but then I saw "Liam was a successful property developer with offices in Seattle and here on Whidbey Island" and the main character was "going to work," but where? She talks about her mother winning a case and this reminds me of a younger female as the story does not really give a clear indication as to what she does or how old she even is (even though I do suspect that she is at least 20 or older).
Then "After dating for a year and a half, I’d finally moved into Liam’s house." Okay, she sounds young again....I know I am making a big deal about it, but honestly, this keeps rubbing me the wrong way and I am not entirely sure why but I don't like it.
The two talk some more, dinner at her family (and if she should cancel for him, but good thing he assures her it's okay to eat with them?), how she owes a large part of her life (not heart??) to him because she was messed up without him (like I understand that it is supposed to be sweet and all, but if you are dependent on him to that extent, it that truly a sustainable love or....)?
Then the story talks about the main character's friend, Melissa (and only friend or what?) I have to wonder what the heck it is with some books where it's popular to only have one friend and they are the ones who actually invite the main character out and show actions of actually being a friend? What about a main character who invites her friends out and interacts with them first? I guess it's cute to have such a bond so much so that no one else could compare, but that just sounds distant and lazy. I have seen this a lot in books and I don't really understand. I understand that sometimes people won't respond to texts or maybe it's not a good fit, but actively not talking to others because one fears them not liking them will never work because what if they feel the same about you? This is not high school or middle school or elementary school. I mainly have a problem with this as she does not try to interact with others, it seems as if her only friend is her boyfriend and Melissa came along one day and made friends with her only for her to kind of accept it, but honestly I can see this in many YA novels so it's not a new thing.
The main character ends the chapter by trying to be mysterious saying, "But I knew the truth: I couldn’t trust myself at all." This does not inspire curiosity from me or make me think she has more layers, but it does make me feel as if she's an edgy teen. Is this young adult or new adult? The characters are supposed to be at least in their twenties it seems.
I am just asking for some maturity. This girl is getting married to someone older than her, she has a job (what kind, not sure, but she has it), but instead she insists on keeping secrets from her fiance and when her mother says “I rather think telling the truth would be a better way to start a
marriage,” it is clear that she disagrees and this is a MAJOR red flag. If you are actively trying to keep apparently large secrets now, what will you do later??? Geez already I don't know what to do with her.
One thing that this story definitely has going for it is the action. While it started as a typical memory to spice things up and leave people hanging, I have to thank the story for not leaving people waiting for long. There's a murder, memory loss, and an oh-so juicy secret just waiting for the right page to wreck the most havoc onto.
So terrible things are happening and she doesn't really try to do anything at first which is fine because she just had a traumatic experience and someone close to her was killed. But then she says that her boyfriend/fiance is better at planning than anyone she knows including herself, which is also fine, but less fine mixed in with "He’d found me when I was at my lowest, picked me up, and fixed the broken pieces" and I have got to say, this is supposed to be romantic, I get it, but if you do not try to fix yourself and you seemingly let others do, or try to, I suggest therapy. This is not because you are 'crazy' or 'helpless,' but being an adult and struggling to keep up with your own problems is something you can talk about. It is important to be able to depend on others, but it seems as if she sees him as her sole provider, her caretaker, her rock and everything in between. I am 99% sure that means later in the story she and him will have doubts because there will be a time (yes, maybe just one) when he isn't there for her and so she freaks out and doubts that he even loves her.
The action is interesting, not new, but something to keep turning pages for, but the characters are a mess. The ones I even feel like I remotely like are either not there long enough or killed it seems. Rip.
Maybe this will be edited later? The story isn't published yet, so there is still hope...
Firstly, I saw " he was more than ten years older than me" and wondered how old they actually were, but then I saw "Liam was a successful property developer with offices in Seattle and here on Whidbey Island" and the main character was "going to work," but where? She talks about her mother winning a case and this reminds me of a younger female as the story does not really give a clear indication as to what she does or how old she even is (even though I do suspect that she is at least 20 or older).
Then "After dating for a year and a half, I’d finally moved into Liam’s house." Okay, she sounds young again....I know I am making a big deal about it, but honestly, this keeps rubbing me the wrong way and I am not entirely sure why but I don't like it.
The two talk some more, dinner at her family (and if she should cancel for him, but good thing he assures her it's okay to eat with them?), how she owes a large part of her life (not heart??) to him because she was messed up without him (like I understand that it is supposed to be sweet and all, but if you are dependent on him to that extent, it that truly a sustainable love or....)?
Then the story talks about the main character's friend, Melissa (and only friend or what?) I have to wonder what the heck it is with some books where it's popular to only have one friend and they are the ones who actually invite the main character out and show actions of actually being a friend? What about a main character who invites her friends out and interacts with them first? I guess it's cute to have such a bond so much so that no one else could compare, but that just sounds distant and lazy. I have seen this a lot in books and I don't really understand. I understand that sometimes people won't respond to texts or maybe it's not a good fit, but actively not talking to others because one fears them not liking them will never work because what if they feel the same about you? This is not high school or middle school or elementary school. I mainly have a problem with this as she does not try to interact with others, it seems as if her only friend is her boyfriend and Melissa came along one day and made friends with her only for her to kind of accept it, but honestly I can see this in many YA novels so it's not a new thing.
The main character ends the chapter by trying to be mysterious saying, "But I knew the truth: I couldn’t trust myself at all." This does not inspire curiosity from me or make me think she has more layers, but it does make me feel as if she's an edgy teen. Is this young adult or new adult? The characters are supposed to be at least in their twenties it seems.
I am just asking for some maturity. This girl is getting married to someone older than her, she has a job (what kind, not sure, but she has it), but instead she insists on keeping secrets from her fiance and when her mother says “I rather think telling the truth would be a better way to start a
marriage,” it is clear that she disagrees and this is a MAJOR red flag. If you are actively trying to keep apparently large secrets now, what will you do later??? Geez already I don't know what to do with her.
One thing that this story definitely has going for it is the action. While it started as a typical memory to spice things up and leave people hanging, I have to thank the story for not leaving people waiting for long. There's a murder, memory loss, and an oh-so juicy secret just waiting for the right page to wreck the most havoc onto.
So terrible things are happening and she doesn't really try to do anything at first which is fine because she just had a traumatic experience and someone close to her was killed. But then she says that her boyfriend/fiance is better at planning than anyone she knows including herself, which is also fine, but less fine mixed in with "He’d found me when I was at my lowest, picked me up, and fixed the broken pieces" and I have got to say, this is supposed to be romantic, I get it, but if you do not try to fix yourself and you seemingly let others do, or try to, I suggest therapy. This is not because you are 'crazy' or 'helpless,' but being an adult and struggling to keep up with your own problems is something you can talk about. It is important to be able to depend on others, but it seems as if she sees him as her sole provider, her caretaker, her rock and everything in between. I am 99% sure that means later in the story she and him will have doubts because there will be a time (yes, maybe just one) when he isn't there for her and so she freaks out and doubts that he even loves her.
The action is interesting, not new, but something to keep turning pages for, but the characters are a mess. The ones I even feel like I remotely like are either not there long enough or killed it seems. Rip.
Maybe this will be edited later? The story isn't published yet, so there is still hope...