The conversation at the beginning is a bit stilted. I feel like there's something off about the way the characters are speaking. It's a bit awkward and unnatural, and I can't figure out why the main character is so exasperated in every scene. It made her seem like a nag, not a relatable or interesting main character/detective.
Also, why is everyone so obsessed with whether the ground is consecrated? Is there some supernatural theme coming that makes a difference?
The author did a good job in descriptions and scene setting. Honestly, I was just so uninterested in the story that it was a slog to get through this excerpt. The tone was just so off. Parts seemed a bit farcical, others felt like a generic British detective serial.
"Boon inched forward, eager to see what was inside as they put the lid on the mortuary floor.
‘Jesus, that stinks of rancid cheese!’ Boon exclaimed, putting his hand to his mouth and starting to retch.
‘Don’t be so squeamish, it’s just a dead body,’ Rogers scoffed.
‘Dead bodies don’t bother me, I just hate cheese!’ Boon retched again."
I'm sure this will be someone else's cup of tea, it's just not for me.
Also, why is everyone so obsessed with whether the ground is consecrated? Is there some supernatural theme coming that makes a difference?
The author did a good job in descriptions and scene setting. Honestly, I was just so uninterested in the story that it was a slog to get through this excerpt. The tone was just so off. Parts seemed a bit farcical, others felt like a generic British detective serial.
"Boon inched forward, eager to see what was inside as they put the lid on the mortuary floor.
‘Jesus, that stinks of rancid cheese!’ Boon exclaimed, putting his hand to his mouth and starting to retch.
‘Don’t be so squeamish, it’s just a dead body,’ Rogers scoffed.
‘Dead bodies don’t bother me, I just hate cheese!’ Boon retched again."
I'm sure this will be someone else's cup of tea, it's just not for me.