I knew, prior to jumping into this one, that I would relate to the aspect of losing a mother at a young age. I had not expected to find other aspects of Susan’s childhood relatable, including the stifled processing she experienced after her mother’s death. Even regarding our adult paths, I saw some similarities. They definitely weren’t identical, but the driving forces of loneliness and a lack of familial support made sense to me, so her choices played a familiar tune. While I expected this book to hurt, the first half hit so much harder than I’d originally anticipated.
Of course, there was plenty of unfamiliar territory, as well.I learned a lot through Susan’s sharing of cultural and religious beliefs as a Vietnamese American growing up in a Buddhist family. It was interesting to examine the components that seem universal to grief, as well as the branches that were unique to Susan and her family.
While she did include small doses of humor that allowed me to absorb all facets of her personality, she also aptly conveyed the heartache, confusion, and frustration she felt after her mother died. The weight of these emotions were evident, but the heaviness was well balanced.
I found her journey to better comprehend her mother’s identity mostly intriguing, and the end result was beautiful, but there were times when I felt this book was a bit overly (and unnecessarily) detailed or downright repetitive. I think it contained a lot of filler that could have been filed down. The beginning of the book doesn’t suffer from this as much as the latter half does, and although I understand seeing significance in communicating every minute detail, her editor should have helped her be more succinct.
I don’t expect everyone to see the world as I do, so I didn’t have any issue with beliefs that don’t mirror my own until the very end of this memoir. I was saddened by what she shared regarding her shifted perspective on “let it go.” I felt it contradicted the path she’d just taken me down. I still firmly believe it is a harmful, dismissive statement, and I didn’t feel she showed me otherwise, despite concluding with this. Her memoir demonstrated how important it is to NOT let go. She conveyed how painful her family’s smothered emotions surrounding her mother’s death had been, and how letting herself feel, creatively express, and finally talk more candidly with her family had helped her. Being told to “let it go” is, as she initially believed, a denial, and while I understand wanting a more inspirational tone to sign off with, I am dismayed by what felt to me like the rotting limb of toxic positivity.
Regardless, Susan’s memoir was often deeply touching. I’m happy that she found ways to process her grief, and that her methods also led to some healing within her family. Her changing perspective on her parents did make me consider my own parents (my father also died when I was young, although I was no longer a child), and it made me wonder more about their histories, which I know so little of. I felt inspired by Susan’s efforts. I’d like to try to better understand who my own parents were, and how their own experiences shaped them.
3.5 stars
I am immensely grateful to BookishFirst, Celadon Books, and Macmillan Audio for my copies. All opinions are my own.
Of course, there was plenty of unfamiliar territory, as well.I learned a lot through Susan’s sharing of cultural and religious beliefs as a Vietnamese American growing up in a Buddhist family. It was interesting to examine the components that seem universal to grief, as well as the branches that were unique to Susan and her family.
While she did include small doses of humor that allowed me to absorb all facets of her personality, she also aptly conveyed the heartache, confusion, and frustration she felt after her mother died. The weight of these emotions were evident, but the heaviness was well balanced.
I found her journey to better comprehend her mother’s identity mostly intriguing, and the end result was beautiful, but there were times when I felt this book was a bit overly (and unnecessarily) detailed or downright repetitive. I think it contained a lot of filler that could have been filed down. The beginning of the book doesn’t suffer from this as much as the latter half does, and although I understand seeing significance in communicating every minute detail, her editor should have helped her be more succinct.
I don’t expect everyone to see the world as I do, so I didn’t have any issue with beliefs that don’t mirror my own until the very end of this memoir. I was saddened by what she shared regarding her shifted perspective on “let it go.” I felt it contradicted the path she’d just taken me down. I still firmly believe it is a harmful, dismissive statement, and I didn’t feel she showed me otherwise, despite concluding with this. Her memoir demonstrated how important it is to NOT let go. She conveyed how painful her family’s smothered emotions surrounding her mother’s death had been, and how letting herself feel, creatively express, and finally talk more candidly with her family had helped her. Being told to “let it go” is, as she initially believed, a denial, and while I understand wanting a more inspirational tone to sign off with, I am dismayed by what felt to me like the rotting limb of toxic positivity.
Regardless, Susan’s memoir was often deeply touching. I’m happy that she found ways to process her grief, and that her methods also led to some healing within her family. Her changing perspective on her parents did make me consider my own parents (my father also died when I was young, although I was no longer a child), and it made me wonder more about their histories, which I know so little of. I felt inspired by Susan’s efforts. I’d like to try to better understand who my own parents were, and how their own experiences shaped them.
3.5 stars
I am immensely grateful to BookishFirst, Celadon Books, and Macmillan Audio for my copies. All opinions are my own.