I loved Sain's debut novel Dark & Shallow Lies SO much that I could not wait to get my hands on this one! Needless to say, it did not disappoint and I highly recommend you all stop what you’re doing and order this book now!
The story follows 17-year-old Avril who lost her mom 12 years ago to what authorities deemed an accident. A fall from the top of a cliff that ended up drowning her and almost drowned Avril who fell as well.
Through the years though, Avril hasn’t been entirely convinced this to be the whole truth. Her dad refuses to tell Avril anything about that night and he has erased any sign her mother was ever alive from their house.
The saddest thing is, Avril doesn’t remember what happened that night at all even though she was found on the beach drowned and hanging onto her life by a thread. Since then, she can’t even remember the years before that night and remembers absolutely nothing of her mom.
Most recently though, Avril has been getting bits and pieces of what seem like memories even though they make absolutely no sense.
“Suddenly I’m overwhelmed by a familiar ache. It’s such a deep, constant part of me, that longing for my mother, but it still takes me by surprise when it hits fast and hard like this. It feels like being hit in the stomach with a baseball bat. It sucks the air from my lungs and leaves me gasping.”
Avril feels lost. She has no idea who she really is or where she comes from. To finally get the closure she so desperately needs, Avril applies to a prestigious summer theater camp and gets accepted. This is the place of her childhood. The place her mom adored. And the place it all happened that one fateful night. Despite her dad’s objections, Avril goes anyway. She feels that she has to.
He didn’t tell me not to apply, but he obviously didn’t understand. Maybe he would have if I’d told him why I wanted to come so bad. If I’d explained how disconnected I’ve always felt. That I just need to find some link to my mother who’s never been anything more than a ghost to me. Some hint of who she was. Some anchor. So maybe I’ll know who I am.”
With the well-known and loved camp owner, director, and her mom’s old best friend Willa Carver plus all the new friends Avril meets there, she feels lucky to be there and she immediately feels like her mom is by her side and that she may actually get the truth from that night. As soon as she arrives, this extreme feeling of nostalgia overtakes her and she knows secrets are lurking in the shadows of this beautiful island.
Then she meets Willa’s, son Cole. He immediately connects with Avril and feels lost the same way she does. Like he’s constantly running or right on the brink of the answers he’s been needing his whole life. They take on Avril’s search for answers together and quickly find comfort and love in each other. The real kind of love that overtakes everything they’ve ever known.
“I have never in my life kissed anyone like this, so deep that it’s like we’re the air in each other’s lungs. Like I’m trying to find a way under his skin.”
Through the days, but especially at night, Avril realizes nothing is as it seems here. As someone who doesn’t exactly believe in ghosts, but she feels she’s being haunted by something. She is being left gifts and sees things she shouldn’t be seeing and the creepiest part, the fog seems to swallow her whole and it changes the island every time it comes.
The fog leaves everyone feeling like they lost time. Like they are somewhere else in someone else’s world. The barn they were just standing in front of is now a home. The tables are gone. Nothing is right. It takes over your sense of sight and there seems to be no way through it but to just sit and wait it out and hope nothing comes through the fog to get you.
“The fog is already rolling in. It swirls around my feet. Alive and wet. Like a licking tongue. Or waves lapping over the sand.”
I will say this took a little while for me to get into but when I did, I couldn’t stop reading. I had to know what in the hell was going on on this island. It was creepy and odd and everyone there seemed to be hiding something or knew what happened to Avril’s mom but just wouldn’t say it. I felt wary of Avril trusting anyone there and was yelling at the book the entire time in but a good way.
The shock that came…I expected. But I still couldn’t believe it. I thought I had it all figured out but I surely did not.
This story is a coming-of-age book about grief, love, and friendship. It really gets inside the teenage mind and how all of them feel more deeply than you’d expect. How they go through some of the hardest times and manage to pull through. How it takes one single event to truly shape who they become.
I really enjoyed this book and Myers’ has a beautiful, poetic way with her words that really granted the five dropping stars from me. The way she portrayed the setting made you feel like you were really there and could feel the fog coming in or the panic Avril went through. It was mesmerizing.
Ginny Myers Sain is becoming one of my “auto-buy authors” and I can’t wait until her third book comes out!
Special thanks to NetGalley, Ginny Myers Sain, and Penguin Group/Razorbill for sharing this digital ARC with me in exchange for my honest opinion. Being this was an early ARC, this review is based on uncorrected text which did not sway my thoughts either way.
The story follows 17-year-old Avril who lost her mom 12 years ago to what authorities deemed an accident. A fall from the top of a cliff that ended up drowning her and almost drowned Avril who fell as well.
Through the years though, Avril hasn’t been entirely convinced this to be the whole truth. Her dad refuses to tell Avril anything about that night and he has erased any sign her mother was ever alive from their house.
The saddest thing is, Avril doesn’t remember what happened that night at all even though she was found on the beach drowned and hanging onto her life by a thread. Since then, she can’t even remember the years before that night and remembers absolutely nothing of her mom.
Most recently though, Avril has been getting bits and pieces of what seem like memories even though they make absolutely no sense.
“Suddenly I’m overwhelmed by a familiar ache. It’s such a deep, constant part of me, that longing for my mother, but it still takes me by surprise when it hits fast and hard like this. It feels like being hit in the stomach with a baseball bat. It sucks the air from my lungs and leaves me gasping.”
Avril feels lost. She has no idea who she really is or where she comes from. To finally get the closure she so desperately needs, Avril applies to a prestigious summer theater camp and gets accepted. This is the place of her childhood. The place her mom adored. And the place it all happened that one fateful night. Despite her dad’s objections, Avril goes anyway. She feels that she has to.
He didn’t tell me not to apply, but he obviously didn’t understand. Maybe he would have if I’d told him why I wanted to come so bad. If I’d explained how disconnected I’ve always felt. That I just need to find some link to my mother who’s never been anything more than a ghost to me. Some hint of who she was. Some anchor. So maybe I’ll know who I am.”
With the well-known and loved camp owner, director, and her mom’s old best friend Willa Carver plus all the new friends Avril meets there, she feels lucky to be there and she immediately feels like her mom is by her side and that she may actually get the truth from that night. As soon as she arrives, this extreme feeling of nostalgia overtakes her and she knows secrets are lurking in the shadows of this beautiful island.
Then she meets Willa’s, son Cole. He immediately connects with Avril and feels lost the same way she does. Like he’s constantly running or right on the brink of the answers he’s been needing his whole life. They take on Avril’s search for answers together and quickly find comfort and love in each other. The real kind of love that overtakes everything they’ve ever known.
“I have never in my life kissed anyone like this, so deep that it’s like we’re the air in each other’s lungs. Like I’m trying to find a way under his skin.”
Through the days, but especially at night, Avril realizes nothing is as it seems here. As someone who doesn’t exactly believe in ghosts, but she feels she’s being haunted by something. She is being left gifts and sees things she shouldn’t be seeing and the creepiest part, the fog seems to swallow her whole and it changes the island every time it comes.
The fog leaves everyone feeling like they lost time. Like they are somewhere else in someone else’s world. The barn they were just standing in front of is now a home. The tables are gone. Nothing is right. It takes over your sense of sight and there seems to be no way through it but to just sit and wait it out and hope nothing comes through the fog to get you.
“The fog is already rolling in. It swirls around my feet. Alive and wet. Like a licking tongue. Or waves lapping over the sand.”
I will say this took a little while for me to get into but when I did, I couldn’t stop reading. I had to know what in the hell was going on on this island. It was creepy and odd and everyone there seemed to be hiding something or knew what happened to Avril’s mom but just wouldn’t say it. I felt wary of Avril trusting anyone there and was yelling at the book the entire time in but a good way.
The shock that came…I expected. But I still couldn’t believe it. I thought I had it all figured out but I surely did not.
This story is a coming-of-age book about grief, love, and friendship. It really gets inside the teenage mind and how all of them feel more deeply than you’d expect. How they go through some of the hardest times and manage to pull through. How it takes one single event to truly shape who they become.
I really enjoyed this book and Myers’ has a beautiful, poetic way with her words that really granted the five dropping stars from me. The way she portrayed the setting made you feel like you were really there and could feel the fog coming in or the panic Avril went through. It was mesmerizing.
Ginny Myers Sain is becoming one of my “auto-buy authors” and I can’t wait until her third book comes out!
Special thanks to NetGalley, Ginny Myers Sain, and Penguin Group/Razorbill for sharing this digital ARC with me in exchange for my honest opinion. Being this was an early ARC, this review is based on uncorrected text which did not sway my thoughts either way.