Thank you to BookishFirst and Houghton Mifflin Harcourt for an ARC of this book, traded in exchange for an honest review.
This is a fresh, new, “coming-of-sexuality” story set in London. Julia has been largely disappointed by sex, when she realizes that maybe part of the problem is she’s disinterested in the men she’s shared it with--in fact, maybe she’s just not interested in men, period. After her own lesbian awakening, wherein she realizes she really likes women, she’s swept off her feet by the mysterious and sexy Sam. While this new girlfriend brings to life so many fantasies Julia didn’t even realize she had, there are aspects of Sam that leave Julia feeling uncomfortable, on edge, and even insignificant. Should Julia change for the woman she loves, or has she hurt herself by jumping into her sexuality “at the deep end”? A riotous, hilarious, graphic lesbian not-quite-romantic comedy with a dark dash of reality grounding it in deeper themes.
Things I liked:
The representation of the LGBT community.
Julia meets several new friends when she comes out, and their acceptance and celebration of her are beautiful. I got serious “L Word” vibes, but I think this book does an even better job than the original show of demonstrating the support network that exists within the “found family” that is LGBT. We also have a fantastic cast of side characters who, while never given a huge spotlight, bring attention to several different identities under the LGBT umbrella. The eclectic nature of the friend group and their personalities feels like a true friend group you may run into, and that authenticity is powerful within the story.
Ella.
I have to talk about Ella on her own, because she is such a cinnamon roll and a wonderful delight. I occasionally will read a book and think, “Everyone needs a friend like [insert character’s name here].” This book was no exception, because everyone needs an Ella in their life.
The humor.
Okay, it was a little dark and a little raunchy at times. But, all the same, it was well-written and very situational. I like a book that will make me literally laugh out loud, and this book accomplished that. This is a specific brand of humor, so I don’t think everyone will love it, but I enjoyed it greatly.
Eric.
Another character who deserves his own acknowledgment! Eric was a great thread through the entire story, even as his appearances in the book weren’t inherently significant to the central plot. An interesting choice on the part of the author, for sure, but I think Eric’s existence in a largely smutty comedy is to bring in some extra heart and soul. His story arc left me sobbing on my couch.
The relatively-speaking safe-sex scenes.
If you have not read this yet and intend to, just know: the sex scenes are as on-the-page as they can get, and there are a lot of them! While not all of the sex in this book is safe (and consent is occasionally a question rather than a yes--more on that in the section “Things I Think Could Have Been Better”), there is at least a discussion of 1) what sex between women is like, and 2) some healthy practices to use during said sex. Always a good thing in new books!
The random inside jokes.
I’ll be honest--I had to Google a few of these, or ask a friend about them, but some of the lesbian-specific inside jokes and cultural things this book talks about are great. It grounds the narrative in the long history of fiction like it, while also showing the evolution of this genre and the people it describes. Also, I love when a non-educational book gives me an education anyway!
The honest self-reflection on a breakup.
[This paragraph contains spoilers!] I loved the fact that, after Julia and Sam break up, Julia reflects on the fact that Sam’s account of things will make Julia the Bad Guy. There were clearly some issues in this relationship, and Sam was controlling and abusive, but when Sam talks about the breakup, she won’t describe it that way. That is so real to life! When we go through breakups, even if our ex was the worst person on the planet, they aren’t going to start saying, “She broke up with me because I was possessive and verbally abused her on a regular basis.” Instead, they may say, “She was too insecure and couldn’t handle all of me. She wanted me to change for her but didn’t want to change for me.” And so on. I love that Davies writes to capture this sort of “she said/she said” in the book, and I think it adds some extra nuance to the end of the story.
Things I Think Could Have Been Better
There were some harmful stereotypes.
This book relied on a couple of stereotypes that are often inaccurate and harmful to the representation of the LGBT community. The first is the “predatory lesbian” who is “recruiting” straight women for the “lesbian team.” We’re rather familiar with this right now, due to James Charles…ahem. Anyway. This book has a similar theme in it. When Julia is first questioning her sexuality, the first woman she encounters is...more forward than is necessary when hitting on Julia. Everything theoretically works out because, in the end, Julia is a lesbian and she enjoys sleeping with the woman. However, initial consent is left as a big question mark. This narrative is popular in LGBT fiction because it pairs well with the “I didn’t know I was gay until…” storyline. However, new literature needs to do a better job of not glorifying behavior that revolves around language like “convert,” “recruit,” and “seduce,” particularly when the person is currently perceived as “straight.”
There are also inaccurate and harmful representations of BDSM in this book. While my knowledge on this subject is limited and secondhand, I do know how important “consent” is in this particular community. As that is not addressed well in this book, the representation is off. It’s okay to have a main character curious about BDSM, who through your story ultimately decides it’s not for her. That’s realistic; that could actually happen. Where this book fell short is BDSM was almost demonized for the sake of the plot (Or, more accurately, Sam’s interpretation of BDSM was never called out for being wrong).
There are other smaller-mentioned, less significant stereotypes that I was less than happy to see, but overall those are my only “negatives” for this book. So, I prefer to phrase this as, I like where this book went and don’t care for all the ways it got there. Newer literature has some high obligations to learn from previous works and then do better. This was a good first start, but we need to continue to eliminate these negative stereotypes from our canon if we want to reach a newer, more authentic representation of all communities. And I say that as someone outside this particular situation, who at one time believed a lot of the stereotypes because they were all I saw.
To end on a more positive note (because, despite its flaws, this book earned its four stars from me), this is a riotous, hilarious book that details one woman’s journey to understanding herself and her identity. It’s not the traditional “coming out” story, and it’s not the traditional romance. It’s something a little different, a little more graphic, and still with a lot of heart. I recommend this to anyone who read When Katie Met Cassidy and felt a little let down, or to anyone looking for a new LGBT/lesbian-focused drama-comedy.
This is a fresh, new, “coming-of-sexuality” story set in London. Julia has been largely disappointed by sex, when she realizes that maybe part of the problem is she’s disinterested in the men she’s shared it with--in fact, maybe she’s just not interested in men, period. After her own lesbian awakening, wherein she realizes she really likes women, she’s swept off her feet by the mysterious and sexy Sam. While this new girlfriend brings to life so many fantasies Julia didn’t even realize she had, there are aspects of Sam that leave Julia feeling uncomfortable, on edge, and even insignificant. Should Julia change for the woman she loves, or has she hurt herself by jumping into her sexuality “at the deep end”? A riotous, hilarious, graphic lesbian not-quite-romantic comedy with a dark dash of reality grounding it in deeper themes.
Things I liked:
The representation of the LGBT community.
Julia meets several new friends when she comes out, and their acceptance and celebration of her are beautiful. I got serious “L Word” vibes, but I think this book does an even better job than the original show of demonstrating the support network that exists within the “found family” that is LGBT. We also have a fantastic cast of side characters who, while never given a huge spotlight, bring attention to several different identities under the LGBT umbrella. The eclectic nature of the friend group and their personalities feels like a true friend group you may run into, and that authenticity is powerful within the story.
Ella.
I have to talk about Ella on her own, because she is such a cinnamon roll and a wonderful delight. I occasionally will read a book and think, “Everyone needs a friend like [insert character’s name here].” This book was no exception, because everyone needs an Ella in their life.
The humor.
Okay, it was a little dark and a little raunchy at times. But, all the same, it was well-written and very situational. I like a book that will make me literally laugh out loud, and this book accomplished that. This is a specific brand of humor, so I don’t think everyone will love it, but I enjoyed it greatly.
Eric.
Another character who deserves his own acknowledgment! Eric was a great thread through the entire story, even as his appearances in the book weren’t inherently significant to the central plot. An interesting choice on the part of the author, for sure, but I think Eric’s existence in a largely smutty comedy is to bring in some extra heart and soul. His story arc left me sobbing on my couch.
The relatively-speaking safe-sex scenes.
If you have not read this yet and intend to, just know: the sex scenes are as on-the-page as they can get, and there are a lot of them! While not all of the sex in this book is safe (and consent is occasionally a question rather than a yes--more on that in the section “Things I Think Could Have Been Better”), there is at least a discussion of 1) what sex between women is like, and 2) some healthy practices to use during said sex. Always a good thing in new books!
The random inside jokes.
I’ll be honest--I had to Google a few of these, or ask a friend about them, but some of the lesbian-specific inside jokes and cultural things this book talks about are great. It grounds the narrative in the long history of fiction like it, while also showing the evolution of this genre and the people it describes. Also, I love when a non-educational book gives me an education anyway!
The honest self-reflection on a breakup.
[This paragraph contains spoilers!] I loved the fact that, after Julia and Sam break up, Julia reflects on the fact that Sam’s account of things will make Julia the Bad Guy. There were clearly some issues in this relationship, and Sam was controlling and abusive, but when Sam talks about the breakup, she won’t describe it that way. That is so real to life! When we go through breakups, even if our ex was the worst person on the planet, they aren’t going to start saying, “She broke up with me because I was possessive and verbally abused her on a regular basis.” Instead, they may say, “She was too insecure and couldn’t handle all of me. She wanted me to change for her but didn’t want to change for me.” And so on. I love that Davies writes to capture this sort of “she said/she said” in the book, and I think it adds some extra nuance to the end of the story.
Things I Think Could Have Been Better
There were some harmful stereotypes.
This book relied on a couple of stereotypes that are often inaccurate and harmful to the representation of the LGBT community. The first is the “predatory lesbian” who is “recruiting” straight women for the “lesbian team.” We’re rather familiar with this right now, due to James Charles…ahem. Anyway. This book has a similar theme in it. When Julia is first questioning her sexuality, the first woman she encounters is...more forward than is necessary when hitting on Julia. Everything theoretically works out because, in the end, Julia is a lesbian and she enjoys sleeping with the woman. However, initial consent is left as a big question mark. This narrative is popular in LGBT fiction because it pairs well with the “I didn’t know I was gay until…” storyline. However, new literature needs to do a better job of not glorifying behavior that revolves around language like “convert,” “recruit,” and “seduce,” particularly when the person is currently perceived as “straight.”
There are also inaccurate and harmful representations of BDSM in this book. While my knowledge on this subject is limited and secondhand, I do know how important “consent” is in this particular community. As that is not addressed well in this book, the representation is off. It’s okay to have a main character curious about BDSM, who through your story ultimately decides it’s not for her. That’s realistic; that could actually happen. Where this book fell short is BDSM was almost demonized for the sake of the plot (Or, more accurately, Sam’s interpretation of BDSM was never called out for being wrong).
There are other smaller-mentioned, less significant stereotypes that I was less than happy to see, but overall those are my only “negatives” for this book. So, I prefer to phrase this as, I like where this book went and don’t care for all the ways it got there. Newer literature has some high obligations to learn from previous works and then do better. This was a good first start, but we need to continue to eliminate these negative stereotypes from our canon if we want to reach a newer, more authentic representation of all communities. And I say that as someone outside this particular situation, who at one time believed a lot of the stereotypes because they were all I saw.
To end on a more positive note (because, despite its flaws, this book earned its four stars from me), this is a riotous, hilarious book that details one woman’s journey to understanding herself and her identity. It’s not the traditional “coming out” story, and it’s not the traditional romance. It’s something a little different, a little more graphic, and still with a lot of heart. I recommend this to anyone who read When Katie Met Cassidy and felt a little let down, or to anyone looking for a new LGBT/lesbian-focused drama-comedy.