Toxic mother/daughter relationship

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This amazing memoir is about the author’s troublesome relationship with her mother, Malabar, beginning at the age 14. Rennie is lying in bed when she is awoken in the middle of night and told from her mother that she was kissed by another man. The enormous impact of that night and the events that followed had a significant and traumatic affect into Rennie’s young life all the way into her adulthood. ⁣

I was thoroughly disgusted with how the mother, Malabar, took advantage of her young daughter’s vulnerability and turned her into some type of ‘confidant’. As a young girl, Rennie was so desperate for Malabar’s love and attention that she fully participated in helping hide the affair from everyone around them. Imagine being a young girl, desperately seeking an unconditional bond with your mother, only to be sucked into some secret affair, knowing the detrimental affect it could have on your loved ones. Rennie was essentially forced to help her mother keep it a secret which at many times caused Rennie severe anxiety and guilt for being involved. At no point early on did Rennie realize this was not “normal” until she began to share her story with boyfriends as a young adult. With some self-reflection, it dawned on her the emotional abuse she had been put through needed to be addressed and it almost destroyed their relationship. Sadly, there were multiple people deeply affected by this affair too, and near the end of the book you will quickly learn the enormity of the situation.

Looking at Rennie’s life through her eyes is so interesting because while she loves her mother dearly, she knows what she’s done to her was incredibly wrong. Whether Malabar is just self-absorbed or just a sad, sick person, I feel terrible for what Rennie was put through and I admire her strength to tell her story.

Overall this book very well-written—a quick read yet a compelling page-turner. I highly recommend this for memoir lovers!